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{since October 3, 2005 - updated almost daily,
archived weekly Archive lives here.}
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Monday, November 20, 2005
It's the simple things that you forget about. Like how brand new babies pull their legs up to their tummies like they don't have enough room. Or how soft their hair is. Or how the world stops when they sigh. Or how very dainty the cry of a preemie is and how it can somehow still wake you at 3am, even if the streetcar outside is just as loud.
I am really, really lucky to have such a wonderful first born. I'm saying this the morning after the tantrum to end all tantrums. But I know why he sometimes freaks ans seems totally out of control. At home, Chris and I are really reginmented. We have set in stone routines that no one dare breaks, so Richard can pretty much say he knows exactly how his day is going to go at home, and with general errands mixed in to the routines of home, he's an amazingly well behaved littled man. But last night, we went to my parent's place fairly early in the evening and stayed until almost 10pm. Being out for that long will do it, but especially that late. I got sidetracked by the tantrum, what was I writing about? Right. That even after an evening like the one we experienced last night, I can still say that I am so very lucky to have such a wonderful little Richard. He's amazing with Helena and he's got a lot of common sense that saves us both from being frustrated. Instead of running up to me when I'm feeding Helena and asking that I do something for him, he comes up to me and asks me if I can do something for him when I'm done feeding Helena. I am also really lucky that Chris is so good at burping babies and that he doesn't really get sick of it. I'm getting much, much better at it, but it's ncie to be able to say 'hey, wanna come give me a burp?'
I'm trying to get as much knitting and baking and cross stitching and baby staring done as I can before Helena learns how to scream. At this point she'll only scream if she feels I'm taking too long warming up her breastmilk, but from what I recall with Richard, preemies find out they can wail with the best of them when they're just under 2 months old. I'm sure I'm going to regret saying this (and possibly even deny I ever did), but I'm really going to be excited when she finally starts screaming like a full term baby and I can stop thinking that I'm going to sleep through her little coos that are telling me she needs to have her diaper changed.
Wednesday, November 16, 2005
Where do I start? On the 3rd, I thought for sure I was in labor.
My plug fell out and when that happened with Richard he was born
just a few hours later. I went to the hospital and they told me since I was
only 2 cm
dilated and not having regular contractions, I should go home and
wait for the baby to decide when it was time. So fine, after a day at the
hospital
I went home and waited. That was Thursday.
Shortly after getting home from the hospital on Thursday night, something else somewhat graphic happened. For my dear friends and Chris' dear friends who have not had the pleasure of having children I'm not going to write about it. Just know that it wasn't painful, but really gross, and I knew I had to go back to the hospital in the morning. When I got there Friday morning, they tell me I'm still 2 cm, and what happened the night before just means that labor is on the way, not necessarily happening right now.
Sunday and Monday I felt little popping sensations, similar to what I felt shortly before my water broke with Richard and I was waiting for the bigger pop followed by my water breaking, and it never happened. By Tuesday morning I was concerned and I went to the hospital AGAIN. I told my doc I thought I was leaking. She checked me out and wasn't sure so she ran a test on what she found and the test came back positive, I was leaking. Leaking fluid when you're pregnant is really bad, sometimes they can fix the leak, but when you're past a certain time in your pregnancy they recommend you be induced to get the baby out of any danger it may be in. We decided to go ahead and induce me. That was around 11am.
So I called Chris, and then my mom and all the info got around to everyone who needed to know it, and within half an hour Chris and my mother were at my bedside, my sister was with Richard and my father was furiously trying to finish up at work to get to me. None of us knew, but he had no reason to rush.
I was started on a round of antibiotics, just in case, because we
really had no idea how long I had been leaking. That was around noon, then
at 4, they started the pitocin and the second round of antibiotics. Several
hours in to this long and sort of boring time dealing with contractions that
hurt but were not going anywhere, I was set up with an epidural. Let's have
a word or two about that shall we? The epidural, I can say in retrospect,
is an amazing, amazing thing. Having said that, getting one is scary! I have
a phobia of needles and I just about passed out. I was sweating and mentally
flipping out, it took me almost half an hour after it was over to calm down.
If Chris wasn't there telling me it would do me some good after it was all
said and done, I don't think I would have gone through with it and instead
I would have been in grueling pain. Thanks Chris.
Shortly after I was glowing and could not feel any pain. I was really excited to think that I may be able to get through this without screaming. Hahahaha. My doc came in and helped me out some more by breaking my water, around 9ish I think. For hours everything was really boring and then around midnight the incomprehensible pain started. I mean, I could not describe this without getting really graphic and even then there's no way I could do it justice. Just know that it hurt really, really bad. The nurse checks me and I'm only 4 cm. I really want to rip someone's head off.
Then in the midst of all the hurting, the napping husband awakens. He decides that he needs to get a blast of November air to wake up in order to deal with the commotion. So he goes downstairs to the exit he'd been using to go for smokes all day, and it was locked. So now he's slightly more awake and he panics because he can't find an exit. Finally, he finds one, gets a blast of air and gets back upstairs. In the meantime, I ask to be checked, between my screaming, I should say. So the nurse checks me again, this is no longer than 10 minutes from when she last checked me, and now I'm 10 cm, which is go time for those of you who haven't done this before. I want to push but the nurse is asking me not to because my doc is doing an emergency c-section down the hall and Chris still isn't back. I hold off until Chris comes back in the room, and then I give a couple of pushes and it was over as quickly as it started. I was waiting for someone to shout 'congrats, it's a boy/girl', but it didn't happen. Eventually Chris asked, and we were told we had a wee little girl.
We were really lucky because her pediatrician just happened to be
the doctor on call that night, so he was the first to see her, I held her
for a few minutes, and then she was whisked off to the NICU, much like Richard
was 5 years ago.
She was on oxygen for a couple of days and in the incubator for a few as well. She had jaundice for a day, and now we're finally at the end of the NICU road. Looks like she'll be home by the end of the week after losing weight this week and not wanting to take the bottle (breastmilk), she finally gained today and for the last few days she's been happy with the bottle. More updates as they happen. Or call. :)
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